Meeting Recap - February 6, 2014

Well -- it's been almost a month since our last meeting, as we were iced out on Jan. 23rd (boo!) Yesterday's meeting was a refreshing reminder about how much we love MOPS and our time together. 

After a delicious breakfast provided by the pink and purple tables, Lauren started us off with a few announcements:

• Mark your calendar for these upcoming events
• March 6 - Spa Day @ MOPS! Come to the meeting prepared to get pampered!
• April 11 - Adult Dinner Party @ 6pm. Book your babysitters now!
• April 24 - Mom's Night Out at Lauren's house
• May 17 - Family Fun Day at the Dunlora Clubhouse

• The Hope Community Center is holding a Valentine's Day dinner fundraiser at 6pm on Feb. 14th at Covenant Church on Rio Road. For more information, please contact Marianne T. or check out the website here. 

• Elizabeth shared a letter for all of us from Mundy's parents, Edie and Lee. If you would like to send them a card, please see Lauren or Elizabeth for address details.

After announcements, Megan C. shared some of her "favorites" as today's door prizes. Her gift bag was filled with goodies related to photography and baking, and her book was Kisses from Katie. Congrats to the winners Ivonne and Amy P.!

Beth McCay

We had a couple of special guests in our midst this morning -- Lauren's mom and grandmother, Beth McCay and Eveley Lambert! Beth shared with us for a few minutes about what it was like raising 5 children and how important it is, even in the midst of harried, crazy days, to nurture our relationship with the Lord. As she put it, that is the most important relationship that we will ever have. A special verse she shared with us is Romans 12:1: Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.

Finally, we welcomed our guest speaker, local pediatrician Dr. Carol Boersma. Carol spoke to us about age-appropriate discipline, giving pointers and advice for children ages 6 months to 4 years. While strategies for discipline are always evolving & create challenges for parents, Carol emphasized that it's most important to show grace towards your children and yourself. She recommended Tim Kimmel's book, Grace Based Parenting, and spoke about how children have 3 driving inner needs for security, significance and strength, and about how a parent's goal is to give children a purpose, hope and love above all things. It's important it is to keep these inner needs and goals in the forefront when administering discipline. 

She advised that for younger children (age 24 months and younger) redirection is typically the method that works best. As the child comes closer to the 18-24 month range and tantrums occur, you can acknowledge and then ignore the behavior. For example, you can say "I know you're angry, but this [action] is not safe."  

For age 2, time-outs are generally very effective. Have a consistent space to put the child for time-out, that is not a "fun" area and not the crib/bed if it can be helped. At this age, kids need to know that actions have consequences. Keep it simple; for example you can say, "No biting. Time-out."   

Dr. Carol Boersma

At age 3, most kids prefer some predictability/structure in their routine. This is a good time to introduce choices to the child so he/she has a sense of control, even though as a parent you are containing their choices. For example, you can say, "Would you like to leave for the grocery store now, or after you finish your puzzle?"

Age 4 is the age of "sassy." Children will debate & question parents about everything. This is when having a language of choices is key, as well as giving them some responsibilities. Telling them what they can do instead of always saying what they shouldn't be doing can also be most beneficial. 

There is no right answer for every child when it comes to discipline. But, disciplining with the goal of giving your child a purpose, hope and love, speaks to their heart more than any other form of discipline.

Following Carol's talk, many moms took advantage of a long Q&A session, and the meeting wrapped a few minutes late. We hope to see YOU at the next meeting on February 20th!